Writting this entry while sitting alone under my blk, hungry, thirsty and with insane pain in my heart and neck. I have just been chased out of my house.
In my whole life, i have been leading a very simple life. I dun come frm a rich family, not even well to do. My father was a bus driver who only brings home 1000plus every month to support a family of 4 and my mum was a full time house wife. Being brought up in this background, i have learnt to appreciate many things in life.i wasnt complaining at all.
Years later, after quarrels and quarrels, arguments after arguments, it came to a point that my parents couldnt live together anymore and a divorce came right after that. I was devastated as i was only 14 back den and i even had to attend court hearings. I didnt complain either and i pushed myself on and i know life goes on. It was when my mother had to start working and i learnt to be independant.
Everyday after school, i would hang out with my frens and even after that when i reach home, there will still be no one at home. My brother was in army and my mum works in 7-11, so i have to prepare my own dinner and watch the tv alone. Honestly, i felt lonely. But again, i didnt complain.
I started to work part time at the age of 15. I began to realise that living in singapore wasnt easy and worse with a single parent supporting the whole family. So i worked almost everyday after school and began supporting my own expenses. And again, i didnt complain at all, it was to me, a learning journey to be independant.
3 yrs later, the divorce finally came in and we had to move out frm a 4 rm flat to a rented 2 rm in amk. I had graduated frm sec sch back den and was working full time while waiting for ns. I would travel all the way frm my workplace to the new amk flat and paint, drill, screw and do wadever to make it look nice everyday. My brother was busy with uni and mum was busy with work so i had to do everything myself. And again, i didnt complain because it was somewhat my home.
And den i went on to serve my national service and studied at mdis to get my diploma.
Yrs later, i got into contact with thyroid cancer. My life crashed. My gf of 9 months also left me at the very same time. I was in property and had some savings but it all went into the hospital bills. I didnt get any frm my mum because she didnt had much savings also. I pushed on and finally survive thru it.
Today, i found myself a stable job in cimb bank. Although im just a credit card officer, but i have managed to prove myself and i can fetch home on an average 3-4k a month. However, the cancer is back for more. After 2 major operations, i now have a 5 digit bill to clear. The love of my life left me and my mum stressed me hard on giving her money.
It has come to a point that i really cant see where my next step is anymore. Even during my lowest point in life, ppl are giving me pressure. I can be independant but i do need company at times. My bday is coming and 2 days After tat i will be stepping in to the ot again.
Tell me ppl, is it time to give up? Should i still fight on? I am really confused.
In my whole life, i have been leading a very simple life. I dun come frm a rich family, not even well to do. My father was a bus driver who only brings home 1000plus every month to support a family of 4 and my mum was a full time house wife. Being brought up in this background, i have learnt to appreciate many things in life.i wasnt complaining at all.
Years later, after quarrels and quarrels, arguments after arguments, it came to a point that my parents couldnt live together anymore and a divorce came right after that. I was devastated as i was only 14 back den and i even had to attend court hearings. I didnt complain either and i pushed myself on and i know life goes on. It was when my mother had to start working and i learnt to be independant.
Everyday after school, i would hang out with my frens and even after that when i reach home, there will still be no one at home. My brother was in army and my mum works in 7-11, so i have to prepare my own dinner and watch the tv alone. Honestly, i felt lonely. But again, i didnt complain.
I started to work part time at the age of 15. I began to realise that living in singapore wasnt easy and worse with a single parent supporting the whole family. So i worked almost everyday after school and began supporting my own expenses. And again, i didnt complain at all, it was to me, a learning journey to be independant.
3 yrs later, the divorce finally came in and we had to move out frm a 4 rm flat to a rented 2 rm in amk. I had graduated frm sec sch back den and was working full time while waiting for ns. I would travel all the way frm my workplace to the new amk flat and paint, drill, screw and do wadever to make it look nice everyday. My brother was busy with uni and mum was busy with work so i had to do everything myself. And again, i didnt complain because it was somewhat my home.
And den i went on to serve my national service and studied at mdis to get my diploma.
Yrs later, i got into contact with thyroid cancer. My life crashed. My gf of 9 months also left me at the very same time. I was in property and had some savings but it all went into the hospital bills. I didnt get any frm my mum because she didnt had much savings also. I pushed on and finally survive thru it.
Today, i found myself a stable job in cimb bank. Although im just a credit card officer, but i have managed to prove myself and i can fetch home on an average 3-4k a month. However, the cancer is back for more. After 2 major operations, i now have a 5 digit bill to clear. The love of my life left me and my mum stressed me hard on giving her money.
It has come to a point that i really cant see where my next step is anymore. Even during my lowest point in life, ppl are giving me pressure. I can be independant but i do need company at times. My bday is coming and 2 days After tat i will be stepping in to the ot again.
Tell me ppl, is it time to give up? Should i still fight on? I am really confused.
posted by xXPINNGYXx at
5:15 PM
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